A World Without Light
by Baleful Eyes
Summary: Valentine's Day. A year had passed since Light Yagami—Kira—died. Misa Amane was not aware. Touta Matsuda was... It is widely known what ended up happening to Misa on this particular fourteenth of February. But now we learn of the events which took place that fateful day.


"_Death Notes aren't the only things that kill; love does, too_." – J.R.

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><p>It was Valentine's Day… again.<p>

Misa Amane was not going to spend another Valentine's Day alone; another Valentine's Day without Light.

She and Motchi had been kidnapped a little over a year ago. Of course her knight in shining armor had come to her rescue.

She was eventually checked into a deluxe suite at the fabulous Teito Hotel, and soon after received a phone call. It was Light; he must have done it! He'd managed to make a deal with her kidnappers to keep her safe, hadn't he? It was so sweet how he worried about her. It made her feel so special, so loved.

Then, after that, she didn't hear from Light again.

Monchihi had explained to her that he had a business trip to attend to, and that he wouldn't be back for a very long time.

It made Misa sad…

But it was okay. Because Misa could wait forever… for Light.

Shortly over a year had passed since then. Misa knew Light would be coming home soon. She could just feel it!

And then, when he came back home, they would get married.

Misa had been planning their wedding ever since he had proposed to her. She had picked the dress, the date, the place—_everything_.

Her maid of honor would be Light's little sister, Sayu. All she needed now was the groom.

Once Misa and Light were married, they could begin their new lives together. She would be Misa Yagami… and that was more than she could ever dream.

Misa finished wrapping the heart shaped chocolate in the intricately decorated paper, giving a sigh of content. She had made it herself, especially for Light. She grabbed her things and left the apartment, carefully holding onto the chocolate.

Misa didn't care what they had said. She would march down to the police station and demand to speak with Light. Whether it be via video chat, telephone or one-on-one (if she was lucky), Misa was going to talk to her fiancé on Valentine's Day.

Once she got to the station and was let in, she went straight to Monchichi's office. Misa knocked on the door and entered. She had a huge grin on her face, and her chocolate carefully hidden behind her back.

"Hi, Monchichi!"

Four sets of eyes landed on her.

"Misa," Monchichi said, eyes widening. "I wasn't expecting you. It's good to see you again."

"You, too." She greeted all of the others in the room: Motchi, Ide, Yamamoto, and… "Where's Matsu?" she inquired.

Ide sighed. "He's probably still in the break room."

"Why's that?" Monchichi asked, raising an eyebrow.

"We had a talk, and I think I upset him when I said that he was over thinking things," Ide explained.

"Oh, really?" Misa said. She pondered this for a moment, before saying, "I'll talk to him."

Ide looked somewhat surprised, but then shrugged. "If there's anyone who can cheer him up, it's you, Misa."

Misa giggled. "I'll do that, then!"

"Go right ahead, Misa," Monchichi said, giving her a smile.

"All right!" Misa agreed, punching the air, obviously pleased with this small victory. She would ask Monchichi to let her talk to Light _after_ she cheered up poor Matsu. "Don't worry; I know where to go!" And with that she was off.

Misa ran out the door, a look of determination clear on her face. As she ran towards the staircase, she heard Yamamoto say something: "Was she carrying… chocolate? That couldn't be for…" This was followed by a large sigh.

But Misa didn't care. So they knew she was going to ask to speak with Light. It didn't matter; no one could put up a fight like Misa Misa. They'd still give in.

Perhaps she would sneak up on Matsu. She wasn't wearing heels, so she wouldn't make a sound if she walked up behind him. She wondered if she could scare him.

The door to the break room was open, and Matsu was there. He was seated at one of the small tables; his cup of coffee was placed on the glass surface, and was still steaming. His eyes were closed, and he was pulling his hair slightly.

Misa tiptoed until she was right behind Matsu, and then gave him a firm pat on the back. Matsu nearly jumped out of his seat, but he speedily recovered, leaning forward, hands rested on his knees, and eyes once again closed in concentration. Perhaps he was envisioning something, or maybe he was simply staring at the darkness behind his closed eyes in an attempt to forget.

"So, you're back, huh?" Matsu said. "When you left, I heard you say to yourself that after about ten minutes you were going to feel guilty and have to come up to apologize."

Misa raised an eyebrow, confused by this statement. She quickly came to the conclusion that Matsu probably thought she was Ide.

Before she could tell him that it was actually her, Matsu continued to speak.

"Don't apologize, Ide… in fact, I should be the one apologizing… I'm sorry that I got all worked up about what you said. I shouldn't have called you an idiot."

Matsu opened his eyes to stare at the unpainted wall, unable to look Misa (or rather, Ide, since that's who he thought he was speaking to) in the eye.

Misa smiled; Matsu was so sweet.

"It was wrong of me to yell at you for not believing my… my 'theory'… I overreacted. Maybe you're right… maybe I'm just overthinking things.  
>"It's just… so much time has passed since then. Perhaps I just need someone to blame, so I chose Near.<br>"Ryuzaki… Watari… Chief… Light."

Misa's eyes widened after hearing his name spoken. 'Light'… it sounded almost foreign to hear ears now.

"But I won't let this continue to bother me anymore. It's been over a year!" Matsu exclaimed. "I won't forget—I _can't_ forget what happened, and I'll probably always hate Near for what he might not have even _done!  
><em>"But I won't let that hold me back anymore. Not Near, not Light—none of them! I need to move on with my life now.  
>"I know what happened was for the best… I mean… I <em>think<em> what happened was for the best… who can be sure of what is right and what is wrong? Honestly, at times I thought Kira really _was _Justice."

Misa couldn't speak at this point. She had completely lost her voice after hearing Light's name.

"But," Matsu continued, "I had to stay with the case. It's just… I never would have expected… never would have guessed… that solving the Kira case meant that Ryuzaki… Watari… Chief… Light…  
>"<strong>would all die<strong>."

_CRASH!_

Misa had taken a step back in shock, bumping into—and knocking over—one of the other glass tables.

Blood trickled down her leg from where the glass shards had pierced her. The chocolate which she had worked so hard to make was on the floor, crushed, and coated with broken glass and blood. She had dropped it after hearing the news, having lost all sensation in her arms.

**†****¦†¦†¦†¦†¦†¦†¦†¦†¦†**

Matsuda had turned around immediately after hearing the sound of glass shattering. His eyes widened in horror when he saw her.

Her eyes were even wider than his, and her face was drained of all color.

'Matsuda'. He saw her mouth his name, noticing that she hadn't referred to him as 'Matsu' like she usually did. No affectionate nickname for him— no affection for him.

She was frowning, and in her eyes he saw a million emotions: love, loss, hate, sorrow, _betrayal_.

Before he could say anything (not that he had anything in mind to actually _say_ at that moment) Misa darted out of the room.

Matsuda stood there for a moment until he regained the will to move.

"Matsuda, what the hell happened?" Ide, who had been approaching the door, asked. Matsuda simply ran past him, and Ide went after him.

**†****¦†¦†¦†¦†¦†¦†¦†¦†¦†**

Misa was running up another flight of stairs—entirely unsure of where she was going. She ignored the awful pain in her right leg. It was nothing compared to the pain she was feeling in her heart.

"_Light… Light… he can't be! Why… why would he die…? Why would no one tell me?  
><em>"_Mother… Father… I watched them die… Light… dead… I'm alone now. Even more than I was before. I'm completely… utterly… alone…"_

After reaching the end of the steps, Misa pushed open the door and gasped for air. Each breath—each moment in time—seemed more painful than the last.

Feeling a cold breeze brush against her skin, Misa suddenly realized that she was on the rooftop.

And then she saw it: the ledge.

She ran for it.

The sound of a door being opened and footsteps meeting concrete could barely be heard over the roar of the wind.

She hopped over the small railing.

She fell.

"Misa!" she heard a voice scream, but it was quickly drowned out by the howling of the wind.

**†****¦†¦†¦†¦†¦†¦†¦†¦†¦†**

"Matsuda, stop!" a pair of hands grabbed firmly onto his shoulders. Only then did he realize that, had he taken another step, he would have tripped and fallen off the roof of the building.

"There is nothing," Ide said through clenched teeth, "we can do."

Matsuda watched as Misa's form became smaller and smaller, but was pulled back by Ide. "Don't look, was all he said. Then he ran for the door. "I'll get Aizawa… don't do anything stupid."

Matsuda stared at down at his shoes, eyes wide and otherwise expressionless.

"_This time_," he thought, "_I can't blame Near."_

**†****¦†¦†¦†¦†¦†¦†¦†¦†¦†**

It felt like she had been falling for an eternity. She began to see visions flash before her eyes—some memories, and others moments which she had no recollection of:

~ _"I will do anything for Light!' Misa declared."_ ~

~ _"I'm satisfied with just being used by you,' Misa assured him. 'Trust me."_ ~

~ _"I'm Light's girlfriend, Misa Amane.'  
>'Hideki Ryuga,' Light's friend replied."<em> ~

~_ "Rem,' Misa pleaded with the Shinigami, '… I wish Light would love me… I want Light to be happy…"_ ~

~ _"A pretend boyfriend, right?' she asked Light. 'That's a good start. I'm sure you'll fall in love with me for real one day."_ ~

~ _"Thanks to Rem, Light really became Misa's knight!' Misa pointed out to the figure hovering next to her." _~

~ _"And Misa Amane, this girl's endurance… and her love for Light… are the greatest in this world,' Ryuzaki said."_ ~

~ _"Make it official, you should stop living together secretly and just get married already,' Sayu told her brother and Misa.  
>'I think that's a great idea!' Misa replied with a grin." <em>~

~ _"I'm retiring to become your wife?' Misa gasped, her heart racing.  
>'Yeah, I'll marry you, so quit your job,' Light said." <em>~

~ _"I love you, Misa,' Light told her after she had successfully helped him with part of his plan." _~

~ _"I could never go on in a world without Light!"_ ~

"Yes, it would be… rather dark," Misa whispered, her eyes wet and stinging. Was she crying? Or was the rush of the wind making her eyes water?

The pavement below eventually became visible. Misa could see a light… she could see _her_ Light.

She smiled as she whispered, "You and I will be the god and goddess… of the underworld."

And then all of the light disappeared, as everything… faded…

**to black.**

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><p>"<em>All humans are destined to die someday. The place where they go after death is 'Mu' (Nothingness)<em>"– (_Death Note_, ch. 107)


End file.
